How to Lead Fearlessly: Women’s Leadership Self-Advocacy Examples

Fearless Self-Advocacy Examples: for women who lead

Are you a woman in middle to senior management and feeling like your path to upper leadership is shrouded in mist? You're visible, working hard, contributing valuable ideas, yet promotions and exciting opportunities seem to bypass you.

Then read on.

Many talented women find themselves in this frustrating "glass bubble," where they can see the top, but can't quite reach it. We're often told to "lean in," but sometimes leaning in isn't enough. What's missing is the crucial skill of self-advocacy.

This isn't about being boastful or aggressive; it's about confidently communicating your value, navigating workplace dynamics, and strategically positioning yourself for the senior leadership roles you deserve.

This article is your compass and map for fearless self-advocacy, designed specifically for women in middle management ready to break through the glass ceiling and chart their own course.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. What are my top 3 career aspirations right now?
2. Where do I feel most "stuck" or challenged in my current role?
3. On a scale of 1-10, how confident do I feel about advocating for myself at work?

Decoding the Middle Management Maze: 5 Unique Challenges for Women

Middle management can be a treacherous landscape. You're leading teams, managing up, often juggling personal responsibilities, all while facing unique challenges.  Let's take a deeper look at the most urgent challenges you are up against and some ways to combat them.

One: The Glass Bubble

You're visible, but often lack real decision-making power. You may be excluded from key conversations and strategic initiatives, limiting your opportunities to demonstrate your leadership potential. It's like being in a beautifully crafted glass box – everyone can see you, but you can't influence the direction of the room.

Self-Reflection Questions

• Where do I feel most "boxed in" at work?
• What steps can I take to expand my influence?
• What opportunities have I missed because I didn't speak up?

Consequences of not addressing this: Feeling stagnant, undervalued, and ultimately leaving the company.

two: Bias and Stereotypes

Women often encounter persistent biases, like the double-bind (being seen as "bossy" if assertive, and "passive" if not), tone policing, and the motherhood penalty. A 2022 study by McKinsey found that for every 100 men promoted to manager, only 87 women are promoted. It's a constant tightrope walk.

Self-Reflection Questions:

• Have I experienced bias in the workplace?
• How can I address it directly or find allies to help?
• What microaggressions have I witnessed or experienced, and what (if anything) did I do about it?

Consequences of not addressing this:

Perpetuating harmful stereotypes and hindering your career advancement.

three: The Confidence Gap

 

Women are often socialised to downplay their accomplishments, which can lead to a confidence gap. It's like having a dimmer switch on your potential.

Self-Reflection Questions: 

• What limiting beliefs do I hold about my abilities?
• How can I challenge these beliefs and build my confidence?
• What are my strengths, and how can I leverage them more effectively?

Consequences of not addressing this:

Missing out on opportunities, undervaluing your contributions, and settling for less than you deserve.

four: Imposter Syndrome

That nagging feeling that you're a fraud, despite your achievements, is common among women. It's the little voice whispering, "You're not good enough."

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. When do I experience imposter syndrome most acutely?
2. What strategies can I use to quiet that inner critic?
3. What evidence do I have that contradicts my imposter syndrome feelings?

Consequences of not addressing: Undermining your confidence, preventing you from taking risks, and hindering your career progression.

five: Work-Life Integration & Flexibility

Women often bear a disproportionate share of household and childcare responsibilities, making it challenging to prioritise self-advocacy. It's a constant juggling act.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. What steps can I take to create a better work-life integration that supports my self-advocacy efforts?
2. What boundaries do I need to set to protect my time and energy?

Consequences of not addressing this:

Burnout, resentment, and a feeling of being overwhelmed, which can negatively impact both your personal and professional life.

10 Steps to Fearless Self-Advocacy: Your Actionable Blueprint

Self-advocacy is a skill you can learn and refine. And that is great news because it puts your growth and development firmly in your hands.

Below I've put together 10 ways you can create new, positive habits that become your actionable blueprint.  Which of these are you already doing and which one of these can you take up today?

ONE: Acknowledge Your Value:

Start by recognising and celebrating your accomplishments. Keep a "brag file" – a running log of projects you've led, problems you've solved, and positive feedback you've received. This is invaluable for performance reviews or promotion discussions.

Example: Instead of just "Managed project X," write "Managed project X, which was delivered on time and under budget, resulting in a 15% increase in efficiency for the team. This was achieved by implementing a new project management system and effectively delegating tasks."

Story: Ursula Burns, former CEO of Xerox, started as an intern and rose through the ranks by consistently demonstrating her value and advocating for herself.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. What are my top 5 accomplishments in the past year?
2. How can I better document and showcase my contributions?
3. What unique skills and experience do I bring to the table?

TWO: Master the Art of Communication:

Practice communicating your needs and ideas clearly and confidently, without being perceived as aggressive. Use "I" statements ("I believe...") and focus on the impact of your work ("This project resulted in...").

Example: "I've noticed the team's workload has increased significantly. I believe we need to discuss strategies for redistributing tasks or requesting additional resources to ensure we can continue to meet deadlines and maintain quality."

Story: Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Meta, is known for her assertive communication style. She advocates for herself and her team while maintaining respectful relationships.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. How can I communicate my needs and ideas more assertively while maintaining respectful relationships?
2. What specific situations make me hesitant to speak up?
3. How can I prepare for them differently?

THREE: Negotiation Skills:

Hone your negotiation skills. Research salary benchmarks, prepare your arguments, and be prepared to walk away if your needs aren't met. Don't be afraid to negotiate for more than just money – consider flexible work arrangements, professional development opportunities, or additional resources.

Example: "Based on my research and experience, I believe my current salary is below market value. I'm confident my contributions justify a salary increase of X%. I'm also interested in professional development opportunities in Y area."

Story: Payal Kadakia, founder of ClassPass, successfully negotiated funding by clearly articulating her vision and demonstrating growth potential.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. What are my non-negotiables in a job or promotion?
2. What information do I need before a negotiation?
3. What's my BATNA?

FOUR Public Speaking and Executive Presence:

Develop your executive presence by working on your communication style, body language, and overall confidence. Join a public speaking group or take a workshop.

Example: Practice presentations or volunteer to speak at industry events. Focus on projecting confidence, even if nervous.

Story: Michelle Obama's powerful public speaking style is a testament to the importance of executive presence.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. How can I improve my communication style and body language?
2. What opportunities can I seek to develop public speaking skills?

FIVE: Build Your Network:

A- Mentorship and Sponsorship: Seek mentors who can provide guidance and sponsors who will actively champion your advancement. Sponsors are crucial for opening doors.

Example: Identify senior leaders whose careers you admire and reach out for informational interviews. Express interest in their work and ask for advice.

Story: Oprah Winfrey credits Maya Angelou as a key mentor and credits her as being "the steadiest, wisest presence in my life, and it’s hard to think of a greater mentor."

Self-Reflection Questions:  

1. Who could potentially serve as mentors or sponsors?
2. How can I approach them and build a relationship?
3. What are my specific goals for mentorship?

B- Building Alliances: Cultivate relationships with key stakeholders. Networking is about building genuine connections and offering value.

Example: Attend conferences and networking events. Connect with people on LinkedIn.

Check out my article on how to get more effective at building your leadership network here

Story: Ruth Bader Ginsburg built strong alliances throughout her career and she credited the building relationships as being a crucial part of her 3-Part Persuasion tool-kit.

"Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much." – Helen Keller.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. Who are the key stakeholders I need to build relationships with?
2. How can I offer value to others?
3. How can I expand my network strategically?

SIX: Set Boundaries and Prioritise Your Well-being:

Saying "No" Strategically: Learn to say "no" to requests that don't align with your priorities or overload your capacity

Example: "Thank you for the opportunity, but I'm currently at capacity. I'd be happy to discuss this further if my priorities shift."

Story: Arianna Huffington emphasises setting boundaries and prioritising well-being to avoid burnout.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. What requests do I need to say "no" to?
2. How can I say "no" gracefully?  

SEVEN: WORK-LIFE INTEGRATION

Strive for integration, not perfect balance and set boundaries, prioritising your self-care.

Example: Schedule time for exercise, hobbies and family.

Story: Indra Nooyi advocates for work-life integration and prioritising family.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. What steps can I take for a healthier integration?
2. What self-care strategies do I need to start/stop/continuing doing?
   

EIGHT: Seek Feedback and Act on It:

Regularly solicit feedback. Use it to identify growth areas.

Example: "I'm always looking to improve. I'd appreciate feedback on my recent presentation."

Story: Bill Gates actively seeks feedback and shared how it has helped him personally at his ted talk on the topic.

Self-Reflection Questions: 

1. Who can I ask for feedback?
2. How can I create a system for soliciting and acting on it?

NINE: Find Your Voice and Use It:

Don't be afraid to speak up, share ideas, and advocate for your team. Your perspective is valuable.

Example: "I have a different perspective. I believe we should consider X because..."

Story: Malala Yousafzai is a powerful example of finding and using her voice.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. In what situations do I hold back?
2. How can I become more comfortable speaking up?

TEN: Embrace Continuous Learning:

The landscape is constantly evolving. Stay up-to-date, seek professional development.

Example: Enrol in online courses, attend conferences.

Story: Sara Blakely is a lifelong learner who values failure because gives us a chance to be vulnerable and connect with others .

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. What skills do I need to develop?
2. What learning opportunities can I pursue?  

Navigating Cultural Nuances

Cultural norms impact how self-advocacy is perceived. Research your company's culture and be mindful of your communication style. Adapt your approach accordingly.

Example: In a collectivist culture, emphasise how your accomplishments benefit the team, not just yourself. A study by Hofstede Insights shows that understanding cultural dimensions is crucial for effective communication and leadership.

Overcoming Common Obstacles

1. Fear of Backlash: It's natural to worry. Remember you have a right to express your needs. Focus on communicating your value.
2. Imposter Syndrome: Challenge negative thoughts. Talk to a mentor or coach.
3. Lack of Support: Seek allies and build a network. Don't be afraid to ask for help.

Final Questions for Reflection:

1. What's one small step I can take today?
2. What's one larger goal I want to achieve in six months?

Conclusion

Women's leadership is essential. By embracing self-advocacy, we empower women to rise to their full potential. It's time to shatter the glass ceiling, one fearless act at a time.

Until next time, I'll

See you at the top!

Kerry Anne